Customers Suck

Okay, I understand people find the holiday season stressful. I also understand that people find the prospect of being snowed in stressful.

However, this does not mean you can throw a shopping basket at me when I tell you that the Transformers DVD that is on sale today (or, rather, Saturday when this happened) will not be on sale tomorrow, even if you put it on hold at guest services.

Yes, I’m serious. A “guest” threw a shopping basket at me because he was supposedly freaking out whilst trying to find provisions, but apparently had enough time to pick out a Transformers DVD set.

Everybody is freaking out because they think they’re going to lose power. Everybody is foraging for food. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake.

After I told him he wouldn’t get the sales price, he started going off and spewing a bunch of nonsensical bullshit:

1. “I’ve been living here for 30 years and…” (So what? My store hasn’t even been there for 35 years.)
2. “I’m ex-military and…” (Is that a threat?)
3. “I’ve been to three stores trying to get provisions and I don’t need this right now!” (Dude, you’re buying ping pong balls. How is that helping your search?)

Then he threw the basket at me. I backed up into the corner of my little register section and he began yelling at me to not freak out on him because he “doesn’t need this right now.”

I informed him he couldn’t attack me and that pissed him off. He said he wasn’t attacking me, to get better customer service skills, and that his generation had to deal with “it” and so I have to as well.

Excuse me? Your generation wasn’t typically known for throwing things at shop girls.

After I give him his receipt and run away, I get sort of freaked out. When someone’s in my face, I don’t really back down. I finally found my manager, who I normally hate, and she went over with security and kicked him out of the store.

This is where it got interesting: He started rambling about being ex-military and war and some incident in Germany and whatnot.

Here’s the thing: he was only about 35, max. There is no way he was ever in a war in Germany. And again I say, so what? What does Germany have to do with throwing a basket at me?

Bastard.

When You’re Strange

On Saturday my entire family plus my brother’s girlfriend packed up into the car to drive an hour and a half¹ south of Seattle to celebrate my brother’s birthday with my aunt, uncle, and great-grandmother².

His birthday was actually on the 24th of February, making Saturday closer to my birthday than his. But we made (another!) rainbow cake anyway. My baby brother is 16 now. This still horrifies me. Anybody living in the Pacific Northwest should avoid driving after July 2008, when he plans on getting his driver’s license.

On the way, “People Are Strange” by The Doors came on the radio which resulted in most of my family singing loudly while driving down the freeway with plenty of odd looks from my brother who did not join in. He’s really no fun.

Yeah, my family is strange. What exceptionally odd things does your family do?

1. That last half hour? Totally my dad spacing out and driving way, way past the road that would have led us to their house. ↩
2. She’s 99 and will outlive us all, I swear. ↩

The Internet Is Like High School

A year and a half ago my mom (and the four other moderators who voted) banned this woman from a board because she was seriously harassing and stalking another poster. (Ack, parents on the internet! Weird!)

Now, this woman has been banned from every board ever created. She even got AOL for the dynamic IP addresses so she could no longer be permanently banned by IP. She posts with a million different usernames, but apparently you can always tell it’s her because of her writing style. Clearly, since she’s been banned hundreds of times from other boards, this one ban shouldn’t have been any big thing, right?

No. She went insane. For some reason, she targeted my mom and blamed her for the ban; perhaps because my mom has been the only one to stand up to her in the past. My mom and the moderators eventually just closed the board because they were sick of putting up with her friends as well.

Now when my mom posts at other boards about random completely unrelated topics this lady starts attacking her, accusing my mom of being obsessed with her¹, makes extremely rude comments, spreads my mom’s personal information, etc.

Yesterday my mom posted about something–perhaps French toast², I’ve no idea–and this lady started her attacks again except this time she’s gathered about fifteen minions and they’ve started mocking my mom for having cancer³.

You know what? Fuck. You.

These women are over 40 and they’ve spent the better part of 24 hours relentlessly spamming my mother and now two other people and acting as if my mom has no life. If you’re over 40 and you still gather your friends to gang up on one person and flame them, I almost pity you because you’re pathetic.

Oddly enough, my mom finds this all hilarious.

Ahem. And this is why the internet is like high school.

1. Who’s obsessed with whom here? I mean, my mom never mentions this lady anywhere, but she goes about looking for my mom so she can attack her! Somebody’s brain is in off-mode. ↩
2. Example of this lady’s madness: My mom will post about French toast. This lady will come along and go “G-D, WHY ARE YOU SO OBSESSED WITH ME?!” and then proceed to spend the next few days flaming my mom. ↩
3. My mom had surgery two days ago because she has breast cancer. She’s doing fine right now and will likely be completely cleared after she undergoes radiation therapy. ↩

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